Tuesday, July 5, 2011

blame it on the alcohol?

some of you, dear readers, my know, but probably none of you do, that i stopped drinking for a while. specifically march 2010 until june 2011, so a little over a year.

there are reasons (obviously) for this period of sobriety and they are as follows:

1. medication
2. cerebral palsy
3 getting very drunk and puking in a hot guys bed
4. getting very drunk before noon, taking a cab ride home that i don't have a memory of, arriving home, sitting on my bed, getting the "spins" and passing out

elaboration:

1. medication: i take it, and i just recently switched them, and this new one doesn't say in big bold letters DO NOT CONSUME ALCOHOL UNLESS YOU WANT TO CREATE DEFORMED OFFSPRING/DIE A HORRIBLE DEATH.

okay, so it only says the "do not consume alcohol" bit. but still, buzz kill. ( haha, double entendre)

2. cerebral palsy: I have it. and sometimes (all the time) i don't have the best coordination, and remember in school when the teachers all invited this big burly police officer over to the school auditorium for a presentation in which he called for a few volunteers to come up on stage and put on "drunk goggles" to see how well they could do simple tasks, ie stacking, sorting, etc?

well, i put those goggles on and i was all, I SEE LIKE THIS ALL THE TIME!

so yeah, it's kinda like that. so to counter this, i now drink one alcoholic beverage and then some water, repeat.

3. throwing up, hot guys bed: EMBARRASSING!

4. spins: not a fun time, rooms are not supposed to go in a circle, they are supposed to be stationary.

in closing, grab me a beer, will you?

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